if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A+ Viking dick
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize