Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Randomize
