maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
