During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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