I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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