I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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