question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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