My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Someone stole a lamp last night.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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