just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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