My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
