bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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