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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just spent $27 on things to pee on.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  You know how I know you're gay?

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (206): View more from Washington

  i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.

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• (209): View more from California

  you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!

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• 

  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (309): View more from Illinois

  Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.

  (1-309): View more from Illinois

  I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  And then someone hit me with a pool cue

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.

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