Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.