After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
