Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm so horny!

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm so hungry

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  For your pussy...

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  (508): I'm so horny! (781): I'm so hungry (508): WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY! (781): For your pussy... http://tfl.nu/7j50
  Replies (65) Good night (24509) Bad night (1918)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.

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  (561): Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons. http://tfl.nu/mi7s
  Replies (12) Good night (5871) Bad night (691)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!

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  (732): wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative! http://tfl.nu/b5c4
  Replies (67) Good night (6996) Bad night (1129)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

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  (985): The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH http://tfl.nu/8euf
  Replies (39) Good night (4269) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket

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  (601): she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket http://tfl.nu/j6rw
  Replies (8) Good night (3747) Bad night (1107)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.

  (562): View more from California

  You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.

  (714): View more from California

  Well someones bitter they didn't get any.

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  (714): Hahaha you puked all over his shirt. (562): You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch. (714): Well someones bitter they didn't get any. http://tfl.nu/4mgl
  Replies (20) Good night (5357) Bad night (1509)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"

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  (512): he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls" http://tfl.nu/sggu
  Replies (6) Good night (1321) Bad night (3941)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order

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  (715): I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order http://tfl.nu/7p7j
  Replies (14) Good night (5362) Bad night (965)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?

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  (813): I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2? http://tfl.nu/8h9n
  Replies (16) Good night (1854) Bad night (927)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.

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  (713): We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning. http://tfl.nu/f21r
  Replies (2) Good night (2291) Bad night (691)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night

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  (301): Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night http://tfl.nu/cuhc
  Replies (2) Good night (1381) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,

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  (609): i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina, http://tfl.nu/dlk2
  Replies (15) Good night (1219) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.

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  (707): because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie. http://tfl.nu/erv7
  Replies (1) Good night (709) Bad night (478)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?

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  (714): But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax? http://tfl.nu/2c3b
  Replies (12) Good night (924) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed

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  (517): I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed http://tfl.nu/w2px
  Replies (4) Good night (396) Bad night (697)

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