what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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