there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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