I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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