I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
