am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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