My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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