It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
