Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
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