Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize