he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"