if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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