dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
