Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help