I'm really into asian looking animals
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.