also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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