don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
