I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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