after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
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No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
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Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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