Texts From Last Night

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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  I can't believe you blew on her face.

  (1-662): View more from Mississippi

  I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.

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  (662): I can't believe you blew on her face. (1-662): I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes. http://tfl.nu/gk09
  Replies (78) Good night (2681) Bad night (1846)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair

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  (316): Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair http://tfl.nu/yhl2
  Replies (20) Good night (819) Bad night (4128)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.

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  (919): My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq. http://tfl.nu/vzq9
  Replies (6) Good night (3709) Bad night (732)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home

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  (574): 2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home http://tfl.nu/gyyq
  Replies (13) Good night (5461) Bad night (1247)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?

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  (732): Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra? http://tfl.nu/estf
  Replies (10) Good night (2793) Bad night (772)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.

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  (404): I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach. http://tfl.nu/8lzh
  Replies (1) Good night (1727) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.

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  (630): The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time. http://tfl.nu/80xt
  Replies (7) Good night (2962) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.

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  (503): You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner. http://tfl.nu/k4un
  Replies (5) Good night (830) Bad night (447)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)

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  (860): And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?) http://tfl.nu/cs4u
  Replies (4) Good night (596) Bad night (334)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers

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  (412): I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers http://tfl.nu/enl0
  Replies (2) Good night (794) Bad night (385)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.

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  (989): Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it. http://tfl.nu/6s40
  Replies (1) Good night (962) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world

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  (610): You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world http://tfl.nu/7gyv
  Replies (0) Good night (778) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.

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  (905): I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot. http://tfl.nu/9bpy
  Replies (0) Good night (283) Bad night (418)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance

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  (704): By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance http://tfl.nu/tdk6
  Replies (1) Good night (428) Bad night (458)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story

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  (416): Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story http://tfl.nu/faox
  Replies (0) Good night (264) Bad night (124)

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