bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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