You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
