My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
