And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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