Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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