Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
