I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize