Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
