we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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