the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize