It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
