Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
