don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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