i was born a porn star she said
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize