4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
