If i come over, it means nothing
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
