I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
This baby is an asshole
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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