she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
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